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Pause Button

October 26, 2010

Why can’t I have my life and live it too?

If I were a paid columnist, this might be filed under commentary.  As it is, I’m just whining in public.

I’ve been in a post-vacation funk.  Paris was far and away the best experience of my life—in spite of catching a cold, hardly sleeping and always looking at the bus map instead of the Metro map.  More than any vacation I’ve taken, I don’t want to be home from Paris.  My attempts to write about it haven’t bottled the lightning as well as I’d like.

I’ve allowed myself some consolations.  I’ve been watching my Daria DVDs (thanks Cecilia!).  I’m still reading Les Misérables (only 932 pages to go!).  And I’ve got one last chocolate from Paris.

But life won’t let me sulk properly.  The dishes, laundry and recycling are piling up.  My car battery died.  My iMac’s out-of-warranty memory chip went bad.  I found a hornets nest inside the frame of my front screen door.

I want to hit the pause button on life.  So I can document all the thoughts and distill all the experiences I want to relive later.  So I can savor all the emotions and tell everyone I know that I love them.  So I can fix all the things in my house and car and feel like I’m a responsible adult.  So I can write a book with some kind of solitude and serenity.

Unfortunately, life doesn’t wait for you to live it.  Life keeps moving and makes you decide whether to drag all your baggage along or leave it by the side of the road.

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3 comments

  1. Ain’t that the truth!


  2. Those of us who have not yet been to Paris can hardly stand your whining. :-P


  3. I figured I had that coming.



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